MAGA Bubble

The Claytoonz hot take of the State of the Union

Did you watch the State of the Union last night? If you didn't, no worries. I got you. And if you did not watch, no one can blame you. At an hour and 47minutes, it was the longest State of the Union address to Congress ever, even breaking the previous record, which also belonged to Donald Trump. When it comes to giving long-ass boring speeches that don't seem like they want to end, Donald Trump is the Fidel Castro of American politicians.

To give you the gist of the speech, I'll share what a few writers from The New York Times stated: “A tedious, tiresome performance,” “crabby rambling,” “the heat mongering continues,” and “long, exhaustive, and repetitive.” The speech probably did very little to lift Trump up from his current 36% approval rating.

Trump didn't give a lot of details of his agenda or programs last night, so he killed time by handing out awards like it was a game show because, you know, showmanship. He handed out two Congressional Medals of Honor, one Purple Heart, and the Presidential Medal of Freedom to a hockey player. These are all awards that Donald Trump would love to give himself.

Most of the men's Olympic hockey team attended the State of the Union, which one of them said they were doing, not because of politics yet they allowed Donald Trump to use them as a political prop as they entered on cue after the speech had started, and when Trump introduced them, earning the burgers Donald Trump gave them from McDonald's earlier in the day.

The man tore down the east Wing to build a ballroom, and he served McDonald's to the gold medal-winning USA men's hockey team and made them eat it in a conference room. No word yet on whether Donald Trump was able to abscond with one of the players’ gold medals.

There is a narrative now on the Right that the left opposes the men's hockey team while MAGA supports them, which couldn't be further from the truth. Being disgusted with the men's Olympic hockey team for allowing themselves to be used as historical props by Donald Trump and drinking with the lying and corrupt FBI Director does not mean that we were rooting against them. We are just disgusted with their actions after the game. Just like with patriotism, MAGAts are trying to own the hockey win.

Trump claimed during the speech that the women's team will be visiting the White House soon, yet there's no word about this from the women yet, so it is probably another lie by Donald Trump, who told many throughout the night.

Another false narrative being pushed by MAGAts is that Republicans stood with Americans last night, while democrats stood with “illegal aliens.” Trump said, “The first duty of the American government is to protect American citizens, not illegal aliens,” and for those in the room to stand if they agree. Many Democrats refused to stand. What MAGAts don't get is that these Democrats refused to be Trump's trained barking seals and to do as he demands, unlike Republicans. Republicans have this fantasy that everyone is supposed to obey Donald Trump. If you asked everyone who was in that room last night to stand if they agreed that they are supposed to put the nation before Donald Trump, Republicans’ asses would've remained in their seats.

What Republicans don't get is that between undocumented immigrants and American citizens, it doesn't have to be either or. Believing every right guaranteed by the Constitution also applies to undocumented immigrants (they do) does not mean you are against American citizens.

Trump lied throughout the speech, with one notable lie being that the nation is rife with election fraud, and Democrats can't win without it, as he pushed for the so-called “Save Act,” which will require proof of citizenship at the ballot box. Despite all the barking from the trained seals, undocumented immigrants voting in our elections is not an issue. It is not happening. Trump said, “Cheating is rampant.” The Dems “want to cheat. They have cheated.” It’s the “only way they can get elected,” and then he proceeded to call Democrats names.

As usual, Trump exhibited his racism during the speech. Many Democrats skipped the speech in protest, but Representative Al Green was at least in the room before he got kicked out for carrying a huge sign that said "Black people are not apes,” in reference to the video Trump posted to Truth Social a couple of weeks ago depicting Barack and Michelle Obama as apes. Expect the Republican-controlled House to censure Representative Green for calling out Donald Trump's racism, but not to censure Donald Trump for his racism.

Donald Trump was heckled for his racism when he attacked Somali immigrants in Minnesota by calling them “pirates.” Representatives Ilhan Omar and Rashida Tlaib did not let Trump's racism slide without protest. They will probably be admonished by the House, too.

Trump, who doesn't understand that tariffs are taxes, said that tariffs may one day replace the income tax. He proposed banning members of Congress from trading in the stock market, ignoring that he is violating the Emoluments Clause. He put JD Vance in charge of finding fraud which is like putting Pam Bondi in charge of finding pedophiles. He didn't talk about the murders committed by his ICE thugs in Minneapolis. He didn’t even once say the word “ICE.”

There was no clarity on Trump’s threatened attack on Iran to destroy their nuclear program that he already claimed he destroyed last June, nor any awareness that he delivered his address in Congress, where war powers lie. Little discussion of AI, education, and infrastructure. No explanation of Gaza’s future. No mention of the Epstein files, and on the day it was revealed that Pam Bondi and the Justice Department withheld reports of accusations that Trump had raped a 15-year-old girl. Every Republican in the room should be asked to stand if they're against victims instead of pedophiles.

I did sleep well last night when I finally went to bed because I had watched that speech. It was boring. But most of all, it was bullshit. It was boring bullshit.

Governor Abigail Spanberger, on the other hand, kicked ass. Her speech, delivered from colonial Williamsburg, Virginia, was short, sweet, and to the point. I believe my favorite part was when she went after Trump for his corruption.

She said, “He’s enriching himself, his family, his friends. The scale of the corruption is unprecedented. There’s the cover-up of the Epstein files, the crypto scams, cozying up to foreign princes for airplanes and billionaires for ballrooms, putting his name and face on buildings all over our nation’s capital. This is not what our founders envisioned.”

She framed the Democratic Party’s rebuttal to Trump’s State of the Union address around three questions: Is he making life more affordable? Is he keeping Americans safe? And is he working on Americans’ behalf? The answer to all three, of course, is no. Most of all, she focused on the one thing that Donald Trump ignored for most of his speech: affordability.

The Virginia governor, who just won her election by 15 points, pointed out that Trump's tariffs are a “massive tax hike on you and your family,” and argued that congressional Republicans were making life more expensive and “making it more difficult to see a doctor” while driving up the costs of energy and housing. This is all true, which of course upsets Republicans when it's pointed out.

A White House spokesgoon was unable to respond to Spanberger's speech without lying, and said, “President Trump only acts in the best interests of the American public — which is why they overwhelmingly re-elected him to this office, despite years of lies and false accusations against him and his businesses from the fake news media.”

Ignoring the issue most important to Americans right now, affordability, Trump called this the “golden age of America,” which I'm sure it is if you are a corrupt billionaire pedophile.

Eats: Last night, I cooked up some wings I've had in my freezer since last summer. There are rules to eating wings if you have diabetes, such as that they not be fried, have skin, or sugary breading. Another rule is that they are to be eaten in moderation, and with celery and carrots to balance things out.

I didn't eat the skin, but I broke one rule. I cooked them with the skin still on. I didn't feel like spending an hour removing it. I only ate five of these and ate the other half tonight. I have some Diet Ranch sauce called “Skinny Girl,” which is fine for salads but sucks for wings. It's very watery, so I ended up eating the wings without any sauce.

Usually, I make a sauce for the wings that includes hot sauce, wing sauce bought from the store, melted butter, and honey. But I discovered after I made the wings that I didn't have any wing sauce to add to my mix. I must have thrown it all out when I came home from the hospital and donated most of the stuff in my refrigerator and cabinet to the local food bank. So I drizzled sugar-free barbecue sauce over them and tossed them around in a bowl, and went with that.

So how did it turn out? Meh. I think they look pretty, but they were kind of bland to me, and just as I expected, they were dry as leftovers. However, I really enjoyed the carrots and celery, which means “eating” right is starting to affect me.

My food may be boring, but not as boring as Donald Trump's speeches.

Creative note: There are two versions of the cartoon, and I bounced them off Laura. What I published is the original version, and after Laura saw the change I made in the paragraph, she told me to stick with the original. What do you think? Was I right to go with “Democrats and illegals,” or should I have gone with “golden age of America?”

Drawn in 30 seconds:

Support your local cartoonist: If you want to support the cartoonist, please donate through PayPal to @gmail.com, Venmo to clay-jones-87, or snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.
I also take Zelle.
All support is appreciated.

Signed prints and books: I cannot take orders for signed prints or for my books at this time. So please do not send me money or place orders for them until further notice. Because of the stroke, it is an ordeal for me to get to the post office, so we’re gonna hold up until I’m fully capable of doing so. Thank you for your understanding.

Merch: Did you know there’s a Claytoonz store? My cartoons are printed on mugs, clothing, caps, and even a Peezy T-shirt. If you ever want a specific cartoon on some merch, let me know, and I’ll add it.