Flamingo Stink Eye

Never surrender to water fowl

Shortly after Donald Trump was arrested last year in Fulton County, Georgia on charges related to electoral fraud in the 2020 election, he returned to X/Twitter for the first time since Elmo lifted his ban, and shared his mugshot with the caption, “Never surrender.”

Never mind the fact that it was a photo of him surrendering. Republicans are idiots. Merchandise with that image is for sale on his campaign’s website along with merch featuring images from the assassination attempt in Butler, Pennsylvania.

Now, Trump will try to make money off this incident of a guy hiding in bushes with an assault rifle. What will they try to sell, pictures of his fat ass being whisked away on a golf cart? He also can’t parade around with a giant bandage from this incident since the bush person not only didn’t hit him with a bullet but didn’t even get a shot off. The potential assassin never even saw Trump.

The mental case was waiting in bushes along the golf course hoping Trump would eventually waddle by.

I got over 1,100 replies to my tweet about Trump being uninjured after not being shot at, and I think all the angry replies wish Trump was shot at so they can push the martyred victim bullshit.

But after the incident, Trump posted that he will “never surrender.” First off, fucker…you already have. In fact, Donald Trump surrendered four times. But in this incident, who was he supposed to surrender to? The lunatic in the bushes wasn’t asking him to surrender. He wasn’t there to arrest or kidnap Trump.

The only things yelling “no surrender” at Trump’s shitty resorts that mean it are the bedbugs each time an exterminator is called.

And you do not want to kidnap Trump. Do you know how much it would cost to feed him? Also, nobody may pay the ransom for you to bring him back and then you’d be stuck with him. Hell, you might have to pay for whoever to take him back.

There’s an idea in that joke for Trump. He could pretend he was kidnapped and cry for his supporters to pay the ransom. It would work. The idiots are already buying his ugly shoes and lost thousands in his shitty stock. Why wouldn’t they blow Jr’s college fund to pay ransom to his kidnappers?

What Trump could also do is stop making it so difficult for the Secret Service to protect him. He could stop playing golf during this campaign. He already promised he wouldn’t golf while he was occupying the White House which turned out to be a lie. He must love golf more than this country, and it’s something he cheats at anyway. He could also stop living at a golf resort. Buy a house off the road, dummy.

Another thing that might make it easier for the Secret Service to protect him would be to stop saying ugly and hateful things that make people want to shoot him. Stop calling people “vermin” and the “enemy of the American people.” Stop quoting Hitler. Stop lying about immigrants.

Stop saying things about your opponents as if you want them to get shot. At the very least, it’s why more than half the nation is giving you the stink eye.

Drawn in 30 Seconds:

Timelapse with a voiceover:

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