Trump Fallacies

Trump has no low

As you know by now, Donald Trump is petty, insensitive, self-centered, and extremely stupid.

After a United Airlines jet collided with an Army helicopter last night near Washington Reagan (sic) National Airport, Trump posted to ShitSocial, “The airplane was on a perfect and routine line of approach to the airport. The helicopter was going straight at the airplane for an extended period of time. It is a CLEAR NIGHT, the lights on the plane were blazing, why didn't the helicopter go up or down, or turn. Why didn't the control tower tell the helicopter what to do instead of asking if they saw the plane. This is a bad situation that looks like it should have been prevented. NOT GOOD.”

First, don’t send me corrections for the Trump quote. I post quote them as they share them. It’s not my fault he’s an idiot. Second, thanks, Trump, for letting us know it’s “not good” when planes and helicopters crash into each other. My god, you are a genius. Also, anytime you write with all caps, you should probably follow with an exclamation point. LIKE THIS!

Usually, when a president (sic) makes a statement after a disaster, before he has any real information, he tends to express condolences and promises, saying stuff like “We’ll get to the bottom of this.” It’s all you really can say before you know anything. But, if you’re the president, you also know that you’ll be one of the first people to have that information.

Usually, presidents are consolers after a disaster. Like Reagan was for the Challenger explosion, George W. Bush was for 9/11, Clinton was for the Oklahoma City Bombing, Obama was for the Sandy Hook school shooting, and George H. W. Bush was for Dan Quayle misspelling “potato,” and President Biden was for the four years of the first Trump disaster.

The only consolation Trump ever gave was to those white Nationalists in Charlottesville. The guy just pardoned 1,500 terrorists.

In his post, Trump is asking questions…questions that he’ll be one of the first to know the answers, unfortunately. He knows this because unfortunately again, he’s been here before.

What Trump is doing is using the tragedy to stir more shit up and make the nation even more divisive. Trump benefits from anger and taking sides. But where’s the bad guy in this disaster? I’m sure there is human error in this, but there are no signs of there being ill intent. So again, where’s the bad guy?

The bad guys are Presidents Barack Obama and Joe Biden, along with DEI. Trump claims this disaster is the fault of both those presidents.

Minutes after asking for a moment of silence at his press conference today, Trump got political. The only reason he held the press conference was to get political.

Trump promised to gut the federal workforce and eliminate diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) programs from all agencies. When told there was no evidence that DEI was to blame, he said, “It just could have been,” When asked how he would know, he said, “Because I have common sense.”

Trump told the press, who he hates, “We do not know what led to this crash, but we have some very strong opinions and ideas,” he said. “And I think we’ll probably state those opinions now, because over the years I’ve watched as things like this happen and they say, ‘Well, we’re always investigating.’”

Trump raised the possibility of errors by air traffic control, the Federal Aviation Administration, and the Army pilot, who was flying a routine training mission. Facts? We don’t need no stinking facts.

Trump should wait before he speaks like this because even mentioning the possibilities can send his rabid Kool-Aid-drinking MAGAts into a frenzy. Trump’s speculations and assumptions will be used as facts by all the talking goon heads in the round table discussions on cable news tonight. CNN’s Scott Jennings will be mouthing along to Trump’s bullshit as if it’s a favorite song he’s heard a thousand times before…and we have.

Trump also said, “Some really bad things happened and some things happened that shouldn’t have happened.” That’s just fucking brilliant. A lot of people say they like Trump for his style but who the fuck likes this style?

Why doesn’t America see the irony in hiring the world’s biggest jackass to get rid of DEI?

Trump blamed Obama and Biden for diversity programs that he went after with Executive Orders on inauguration day. What’s weird is that he didn’t go after or try to eliminate them during his first presidency (sic) which in case you need reminding was between the presidencies of Obama and Biden.

Trump read the headline of an article from Fox News whining about an FAA diversity program that was seeking to hire people with disabilities such as missing extremities, paralysis, hearing and vision loss, epilepsy, and severe intellectual disability (that last one was used by America to hire Trump). This program was in place during Trump’s first term (sic). There was no mention of that. Maybe he doesn’t remember his first term (sic) was between the terms of Obama and Biden….or maybe he’s a liar.

And the goons are adopting Trump speak. Newly-crowned Defense Secretary, Pete Hegseth, formerly of Fox & Friends (I can’t believe these aren’t jokes), said, “The era of DEI is gone at the Defense Department.”

Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy, formerly of MTV’s The Real World, said, “We can only accept the best and the brightest in positions of safety.” Fortunately, Trump’s requirements to fill his cabinet are much lower.

Duffy said, “We are going to take responsibility at the Department of Transportation and the FAA to make sure we have the reforms that have been dictated by President (sic) Trump in place to make sure that these mistakes do not happen again and again.”

A lot of people are going to scream at me for this cartoon. They’re going to say, “Too soon.” But I wouldn’t have drawn it if Trump hadn’t started spewing toxic bullshit out of mouth while it was “too soon.”

Creative note: I told a friend I wasn’t going to touch this subject today because we didn’t have any facts yet, though I was sure that Gary Varvel was currently working on a cartoon of Uncle Sam crying, or maybe an eagle. But then Trump opened his mouth. Unless something else changes, you’ll get the other cartoon tomorrow. Maybe I’ll have an easy day. I’ll give you a hint: It features a worm.

Drawn in 30 seconds:

Timelapse:

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