Mr. Johnson No Johnson

Gonads are gone-gone

Donald Trump sucks.

As we celebrate No Kings Day, we need to observe that Donald Trump isn't even trying to hide that he wants to be a monarch over our nation. Putting his face and name on government objects is the sign of an authoritarian dictator. Usually, these are actions of desperate dictators who are insecure in their leadership.

One thing MAGAts do is make fun of people for protesting during No Kings, either trying to defend or ignore that Donald Trump is presenting himself as a king. Saddam Hussein had his defenders, too.

Now, the Treasury Department is putting Donald Trump's signature on the one-dollar bill. They characterized it as a celebration of the 250th anniversary of US independence. It will mark the first time a sitting president’s signature will go on paper currency. Just as they used the birthdate of the United States Marine Corps as an excuse to throw a military parade in Washington DC on Donald Trump's birthday, they are using the 250th anniversary of our nation as an excuse to put Donald Trump's signature on the one-dollar bill.

Correction: David, a subscriber, informed me that I made a boo-boo and that the Marine Corps celebrates its birthday on November 10th. Trump's birthday parade coincided with the 250th birthday of the U.S. Army. I stand corrected.

Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent said in a statement, “Under President Trump’s leadership, we are on a path toward unprecedented economic growth, lasting dollar dominance, and fiscal strength and stability. There is no more powerful way to recognize the historic achievements of our great country and President Donald J. Trump than U.S dollar bills bearing his name, and it is only appropriate that this historic currency be issued at the Semiquincentennial.”

Gag! Is that sycophantic or what? Bessentent must have traded in his balls faster than Mike Johnson and the rest of the Republicans in Congress.

The truth is, the US dollar has decreased in value by at least 11% since Donald Trump returned to office in 2025, thanks to his stupid ass policies, like tariffs and an unnecessary war in the Middle East. So, if Donald Trump has made the dollar weaker, why are we putting his name on it? Or maybe better yet, it should have his name on it as it grows weaker.

This is an insult to American consumers, as they have to pay more to get by, they have to see Donald Trump's name on the very dollar he has made so much tougher for them. And it is just like a dictatorship to tell its people to ignore the hard times and to celebrate Dear Leader's face on the nation’s currency.

How tone deaf do you have to be to put Donald Trump's signature on currency during an economic recession and during a war?

Naturally, Donald Trump hasn't told anyone in the government to stop putting his name and face on things. What all has Donald Trump's face and name been placed on that belongs to US taxpayers?

So far, Trump's face has been placed on banners on a Department of Labor building, the Department of Agriculture, and, most laughable of all, the Department of Justice.

A new one-dollar coin will feature his face. US Treasurer Brandon Beach said in a statement, “As we approach our 250th birthday, we are thrilled to prepare coins that represent the enduring spirit of our country and democracy, and there is no profile more emblematic for the front of such coins than that of our serving President, Donald J. Trump.”

There are several government programs named after him, from Trump Accounts to Trump Rx.

A new class of warships will bear his name. Trump said they will be a part of a
”golden fleet.” Navy Secretary John Phelan said the ships will be “the largest, deadliest, most versatile, and best-looking warship anywhere on the world's oceans.”

Trump’s name has been placed on the Kennedy Center and on the Institute of Peace. There are lawsuits regarding both, because both are illegal.

After some people protested Trump's face being added to National Park passes by placing stickers over his face, the National Park Service updated its policy to say that adding stickers to passes or otherwise altering them could make them invalid. I'm surprised the drop minion appointed to leave the National Park Service and shout, “Off with their heads!”

Last February, Trump announced a “gold card” program that would grant foreigners who purchased the cards for $5 million “green card privileges.” Trump signed an Executive Order in September directing that the program be established with an updated price tag of “$1 million for an individual donating on his or her own behalf and $2 million for a corporation or similar entity donating on behalf of an individual.” Guess whose face is on those cards.

A “Trump Platinum Card” is also “coming soon,” which can be purchased for just $5 million and gives purchasers “the ability to spend up to 270 days in the United States without being subject to US taxes on non-US income.”

During Trump’s first term, his name was printed on stimulus checks issued by the IRS and sent to around 35 million Americans during the COVID pandemic. If we were going to put an elected official's name on those checks, it should have been Nancy Pelosi's.

Trump has also tried to get Dulles International Airport and New York’s Penn Station named after him. So far, his efforts have failed, but don't be fooled into believing he's done trying.

And don't be fooled into believing that Donald Trump is done having his name placed on government objects and programs, Emoluments Clause be damned.

I’m huge in Japan: That’s a common joke in the music industry, where a solo artist or band that has never been heard of in the United States is actually pretty big in Japan. Anyway, I am not huge in Japan, but lately, Japan does seem to like me.

Lately, I have been making reprints in Newsweek Japan.

And yesterday, an interview I did with Japan's largest newspaper, Asahi Shimbun, was published. They saw a cartoon of mine, and for some reason, they believed that I was important, so they interviewed me about Trump's chosen war with Iran.

Flo’s No Kings poster: I told you yesterday that one of my subscribers, Flo, was using my Trump caricature on her protest poster, which she proudly waved around at a protest in Massachusetts. Today, she sent me a photo and permission to publish it. Thank you, Flo.

Creative note: I came up with the idea for today's cartoon and drew the outline yesterday, and decided to hold it for today.

Drawn in 30 seconds:

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