Hate On An Escalator

Does Trump even know how to use an escalator?

Trump delivered a confusing, rambling, and embarrassing speech today at the United Nations.

He didn’t spend a lot of time on the two wars he promised to end on his first day: Russia’s invasion of Ukraine and Israel’s bombardment of Gaza. But he did make a plea for receiving a Nobel for the wars he claimed he stopped. He stated that he didn’t care about awards, but brought up the award anyway. But it’s weird that people give Trump trophies all the time because they know he loves awards, even if they’re fake. Remember the Michigan Man of the Year lie?

Last July, Trump stole the 2025 World Cup trophy while the winning team, Chelsea, had to settle for a replica. But he doesn’t care about trophies, right? This is why he stole the classified documents and claimed they were his. He just likes to take shit that doesn’t belong to him. Trump is a klepto.

During his speech, Trump rambled about everything in this cartoon, except for maybe Jeffrey Epstein and Tylenol causing autism. He insulted most of the world during his speech.

He talked about “stupid people” being responsible for climate policies, calling climate change a “con job” and a “hoax” concocted by “evil people” for “nefarious reasons.” Yes, if saving the planet is nefarious. He accused environmentalists of wanting to “kill all the cows, saying, “No more cows, we don't want cows anymore.' I guess they want to kill all the cows.” At least he didn’t blame windmills for giving whales headaches. Maybe they should take Tylenol.

Trump portrayed himself as the only leader who could solve the world’s problems, saying, “I’m really good at this stuff,” and then said. “Your countries are going to hell.” Charming.

Trump insulted the Muslim mayor of London, Sadiq Khan, and falsely claimed that Muslims in the West are planning to institute Shariah law. Trump said, “I look at London, where you have a terrible mayor, a terrible, terrible mayor. It’s been so changed, so changed. Now they want to go to Shariah law, but you’re in a different country; you can’t do that.” London has no plans to go to Shariah law, but Trump is a liar. By the way, nearly 7,000 US citizens applied for citizenship and indefinite relocation to the UK between January and March of this year, with most probably going to London. I find the prospect interesting. Note, that when Trump returned to office, a lot of people wanted to leave the country. Maybe I’ll bump into Rosie O’Donnell while traveling next month.

Trump exhibited his racism by attacking Europe for allowing migrants to enter their nations. Trump called for countries to close their borders and expel foreigners, accused the UN of leading a “globalist migration agenda”, and told presidents and prime ministers that the United Nations was “funding an assault on your countries.” None of that is true, but that “globalist” comment is an antisemitic dog whistle.

Trump said, “It’s time to end the failed experiment of open borders. You have to end it now … Your countries are going to hell.”

He said immigration is “destroying your heritage” and accused them of allowing international migration because of misplaced “political correctness.” Did you like that “heritage” part? That’s what we commonly refer to as a racist dog whistle.

The only part a rational person could agree with was Trump’s call for Europe to stop purchasing Russian oil.

The most enjoyable part, if any of Trump’s visit to the UN was what happened as Trump was headed to give his speech. Right after he and Melania stepped on the escalator, it stopped. Melania walked up the steps while Trump was looking around, looking confused, and then he followed her, which must have been horrible for him because we all know he hates stairs.

The dumbest part is that the escalator to Trump’s right was still working.

Trump even complained about it during his speech, saying, “All I got from the United Nations was an escalator on the way up that stopped right in the middle,” he said, adding that the first lady “would have fallen if she was not in great shape.” It didn’t appear she was in any danger. Who knew you had to be in great shape to ride an escalator? Trump also griped about a malfunctioning teleprompter. Maybe someone typed in, “Go fuck yourself, San Diego.”

But the White House was enraged. Karoline Leavitt, the White House spokesgoon, said, “If someone at the U.N. intentionally stopped the escalator as the President and First Lady were stepping on, they need to be fired and investigated immediately.” Maybe Trump will sic Pam Bondi on it, as it seems he might have a new enemy, the UN escalator guy.

Jesse Watters from Fox News was even more outraged. He howled, “They sabotaged him, and they could’ve hurt the first lady.” Don’t worry, Jesse. Didn’t you hear that she’s in great shape?

Of course, a schmuck from Fox News would scream “sabotage” without any knowledge of the facts, but as it turns out, it might be the fault of someone from the Trump team. Ya know, if Jimmy Kimmel had accused without evidence…well, you know.

The UN pointed out that a White House videographer was traveling backward up the escalator to try to film Trump’s entrance, which may have inadvertently triggered a built-in safety mechanism.

A spokesperson from the UN said, “The safety mechanism is designed to prevent people or objects accidentally being caught and stuck in or pulled into the gearing.” Ya know what, that would be a good thing. Nobody wants to see Melania sucked into an escalator, maybe her lamp hat, sure…but not Melania. Although I would have snickered myself off my chair if I saw Trump’s tie get caught and yank him into wherever escalators take people. It’s a mystery where they lead after the floor eats the steps.

Of course, the blame could be on the fact that everything Trump touches dies.

Eurotrip 2025: I think everything is set for my upcoming trip to Europe in three weeks or so….HOLY SHIT! It’s in three weeks? I need to go ahead and pack my Canada shirts.

I had three events over three months I was looking at during the summer: my trip to the National Cartoonist Society’s convention in Boston last August, the convention for the Association of American Cartoonists (AAEC) in September (last week), and the Eurotrip in October. It’s almost October. I’m a little intimidated.

I purchased my rail pass about a month ago, but last night I finally set the dates for each leg of the trip and made the reservations I need. Yeah, you buy the ticket, then you pick your trips, and then reservations may be required. I needed two. One cost 6 Euros and the other was 28 Euros. And because the Eurail app is an asshole, I was up until 5 a.m. dicking with that shit. But I wasn’t done. Next, I had to book a ticket from Paris to London through the Chunnel. So I purchased that ticket, and the site said it couldn’t process the booking, but it took my money. I checked my bank account, and yup, it took my money. And there was no email with a receipt. So this morning, I called Eurostar and got it worked out (I think and hope I haven’t bought two Chunnel tickets). After that, and being directed to another site for that company, I booked the trip again, and this time it was easy.

Unless I missed something, I have all my tickets. And I can be scared for different reasons, and the first one is that I’m going to Europe, where I don’t speak the language. I can say, “oui,” “parley foo parfait,” and “fahrvergnugen.”I’m also a little worried that it’s going to kick my ass. There are four nights when I’ll be in different cities. But all my trains are in the morning, and I should have plenty of time to draw upon each arrival, if not on the trains. Yeah, you’ll still be getting new cartoons and blogs every day. I’ll also be documenting the trip, like I did last year. There will be lots of photos and strange stories, because you guys know I’m a weirdo magnet, and Europe is full of weird people. I told you I was going to Germany.

Don’t ask where else I’m going because I’m not going to tell you until I’m going.

Creative note: I’m not in love with this cartoon because the letters didn’t allow me to include a lot of art, and I don’t think it has my usual craziness, as most of the comments belong to Trump. I didn’t go super crazy with the weirdness.

I had planned to do something on Kimmel, Homan, or Tylenol. My Kimmel idea was kinda ruined by him coming back tonight, but there are ways I can change it to make it work. My Homan still works, and I was indecisive choosing between that and the Tylenol autism thing, but after I saw Trump speaking at the United Nations, I saw how I could cover that and still get my Tylenol gag in.

Music note: I didn’t listen to any music because I was running late. It was after 6 p.m. when it became time to color, and I just wanted to focus on finishing the cartoon. Also, I had not eaten today.

What did I eat? I made this trout, which is something I had never done before.

I thought I might mess it up, but at least learn what to do next time. Honestly, it came out really well, though I may have put too much garlic on it. But when the garlic gets to where it’s too much for me, it’s usually the right point for other people. I didn’t have any lemon. But I seasoned it with garlic, adobo, and Creole seasoning. I cooked it in butter and olive oil. This was very simple and pretty cheap. The trout was fresh and not frozen, and cost $6.

Drawn in 30 seconds:

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